“Unrequited love”, the two words in the English language that most people hate to hear, and avoid experiencing at all costs. There is no worse feeling than feeling like you’re on a one-way, solo journey to Rejection City and Heartbreak Town.
Most forms of unrequited love go unnoticed by the love interest in question. People are completely unaware of the feelings being harbored for them by their friend, colleague, or distant admirer.
Some forms, however, are very much known and in the light with both parties being fully aware of the somewhat uncomfortable situation. If you’re finding yourself in either of these painful situations, then read on.
We’ll discuss how to stop liking someone you know you can’t have, and how to get over a guy or a girl for good.
Obviously, nobody wants to have unreciprocated feelings for someone. It can leave you feeling frustrated, rejected, and undesirable. But there’s no denying that feelings are completely subjective and are based on each person’s individual opinions and thoughts. So just because one party may not feel the same as the other, does not make the latter any less attractive or desirable to others in society.
Sometimes, however, feelings may exist on both ends, but there’s something in the way. Whether they’re external factors such as bad timing or long-distance, or something else, such circumstances can make it impossible for you to pursue a solid love interest.
Does this sound like your situation? If so, then here are some tips on how to stop liking someone you can’t have.
Emotions can really take a hold of you. They can be so strong to the point where they overrule your every decision and action. This, of course, is no way to live, especially if you’re trying so desperately hard to stop liking someone who doesn’t feel the same about you. Keep these steps in mind the next time you feel like you’re in an impossible situation of forbidden or unrequited love.
Face the Facts You Can’t Have Them
Like most things that need to be overcome or forgotten, once and for all, the first step is accepting the situation, however painful it may be. It can be a tough fact to face and situation to accept knowing someone who you have strong feelings for, doesn’t feel the same. But if that’s the reality of things, then you simply have to accept it and not hold on to any hope or promise of being with that person.
You can’t move on if you’re trying to forget someone, but at the same time are doing everything in your power to grab their attention or affection. Put in every effort to remind yourself of the situation you are in so you can make daily progress, to eventually get over this agonising reality.
Create Some Distance Between You
One of the most effective ways to get over a guy or a girl is to cut all ties with them. You can’t expect to fall out of love with them if you’re constantly hanging out with them and your paths are always crossing over one another. So, try your best to avoid gatherings and social situations in which you know they will be present.
Unfollow them on social media to stop seeing their posts pop up on your feed, and if necessary delete their number so the temptation to call them is gone. This may all sound a bit extreme, but it is usually the most effective way to remove unwanted and painful memories.
This is exactly how to get someone off your mind for good. And remember, this doesn’t necessarily need to last forever. Just until you feel strong enough to rebuild a friendship or acquaintance with no risk of romantic feelings still being in the picture.
Keep Busy elsewhere
Overthinking and overanalysing a distressing situation can be very dangerous territory for self-healing. Whilst it’s important to allow yourself to go through the motions of moving on, you shouldn’t let yourself get bored or have too much time on your hands. Doing so can lead to an unwanted spiral of thoughts and feelings of liking that someone again. You’ll be back at square one in no time.
Fill your time and energy with things that are good for you and will benefit you both mentally, emotionally, and physically. Hit the gym, join new social networks or clubs, reconnect with old friends, learn a new language, read that book that’s been on your shelf for years. There is so much you can finally do with this new gift of time you’ve suddenly been given. Make the most of it before your new love interest comes along!
Talk it Out With Friends & Family
Bottling things up is never a good idea. Especially when the things you’re bottling up are rejection and heartbreak. I know, I know, trying to find an answer to how to get over someone can be incredibly difficult. Especially if your crush likes someone else or is already dating.
In those cases, having a small circle of friends or family members that you can talk things out with and seek trusted advice from can do the world of good.
Your most trusted confidants can give you a fresh perspective on how to stop liking someone, get them off your mind, and help you heal. They can also provide you with encouraging words and open your eyes to the progress you are making.
It’s also not a bad idea to seek professional advice and counsel if there are certain aspects of behaviour or thinking that you are struggling with. Whether it’s friendly or professional, a little advice never hurt anyone.
Mandi is a 41 year old single gal in Arizona. Never married, she’s been on the dating treadmill for 17 years. She’s dated all different types of guys, come close to marriage twice. Often besieged by friends for dating advice, she enjoys the opportunity to share what she’s learned from personal experience and watching her friends through romance ups and downs.